So I guess, we've all grown up with those online lists of how the "nice guys" promise to love and pamper girls. Those always complain about how girls are always after jerks and whine about how all girls will cry to them when their hearts are broken. Well, yeah...
Let's have a little bit of biology and the psychology of human attraction. So, our bodies release pheromones when we are most fertile. For males, this is pretty much always once they've hit maturity and it stops eventually when they are no longer in their "golden years" of sexual peak. This is because males always produce sperm and so are always fertile. This being said, I personally (completely and totally) believe that the more testosterone a male has, the more fertile they will be. However, I have never officially cross-referenced my belief with actual science, so it is just a belief. It makes sense, the more male hormone a guy has, the more male he will be and the more likely he will impregnate a female. So, these high-testosterone and manly guys are always super fertile and so they must have strong pheromones. High testosterone also makes them jerks. They are aggressive, super fertile, and super likely to pick up another girl just to further his chances of dominating the gene pool. This is why societies work best when there are more females to males and why monogamy is something that has to be worked for, or at least conditioned. That being said, females are super into the high pheromones, which makes all chicks dig jerks. This is because of biology. There is no other way.
We would all love to date a guy who will wait in the dressing room for us and tell us we aren't fat and not take advantage of us while we are drunk. That is a very lovely quality in human beings, but while we are young and fertile, we want someone who reeks of male pheromone and can answer our biological clocks. Often, women achieve this by dating the "nice guys" and then going off and having outside relations with jerks. They have the perfect father figure at home while getting the best chance of baby-making. Sometimes, there are those jerks who are conditioned from an early age to respect females and to be required to really try and romance them. Sometimes, women are lucky enough to find and be able to date one of these men. Yours truly is one of these lucky women.
So, I think this is the tl;dr version of this lesson: if you are one of the "nice guys," there is a great chance you are just too much of a pussy for girls to date.
Anyways, summer has been slightly uneventful. Stayed at home for the rest of summer after going to Taiwan. The most hilarious thing is, my dad is now trying to get me out of the house on extended trips while my mom is trying to keep me here for as much as possible so that I don't have sex with people and end up pregnant and useless. I don't know who will eventually give up: my dad after he realizes I want to go out to somewhere potentially unsafe and I have no female friends who would accompany me, or my mom when she realizes my dad really wants me out of the house so that he could save on the energy bill.
That, and I've been having the greatest craving for artfully prepared beef...
-Wasting Away
Scarlet Bloodmoon
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Monday, July 13, 2009
Karma
New month, one month from last post.
Okay, this one is a little bit more about my sexuality and level of sexual activity. General disclaimer.
So I got back from Taiwan, it was great, solid week of hedonism. Like, at least once every day for seven days. At the end, Plan B. First time I've ever taken synthetic hormones intentionally, and definitely something I didn't dread or feel weird about like I thought I might about a year ago. Maybe it was the person, or the fact that it might have been I was really fertile this time. Definitely learned some lessons, and when the progesterone wears off, I'm for sure going onto watch.
I guess this sounds a tad vague...
Okay. Run down of the reproductive stuff I was talking about:
Firstly, every girl has cycles. It's like a rollercoaster that hardly changes. Sometimes, there are unexpected failures and riders are stuck in the middle for like an hour, but it hardly happens. Typically, the first day of the cycle is counted as the first day of a girl's period. The published average is 28 days per cycle, but that's totally off for most people. About half-way into the cycle, the girl is the most fertile during that cycle. This is a five day window and unprotected sex is going to lead to pregnancy in most cases. It depends on the girl, and there are many ways to tell without having to buy fertility tests. The period before that window, and after the window are safe days for unprotected without any reproduction. (As a side note, sperm can probably last about 3 days if conditions are slightly fertile. 5 is the safe number to work for, but it's sacrificing two days of clumsy teenage trying. The fertile egg window is about a day, so the window is three or four days before ovulation and the day after. For getting pregnant, if the couple is willing, sex all five days will definitely increase those chances.)
Some ways to tell about fertility are the Basal Body Temperature method where waking body temperatures are charted each morning and compared to show when ovulation has occured. The highest temperature recorded in a cycle is when the female is most fertile. This method only works to identify fertility after it has past, so it is often used to prevent pregnancy. Another method would be to observe cervical fluid. This fluid is different from arousal fluid in many ways. It is produced from the cervix and often is the main liquid transport system for sperm in the vagina. The fluid will vary in consistancy, color, and taste and by identifying the fluid, it can help in monitoring fertility. At a woman's most fertile time, the fluid is clear, almost tasteless, and as the consistancy of egg whites. It is really thick, stretchy. In a woman's most unfertile times, she will be dry, or have a crumbly, yellow or milky fluid that usually tastes sour. The last common way to monitor fertility is by the positioning of the cervix.
Birth control and hormones are ways to regulate the reproductive system artificially. By using birth control that contains hormones, the body's natural hormones are overridden and the synthetic hormones regulate the body's cycle. Commercial birth control usually use a 28 day cycle and give the girl a week of placebos that allow the uterine lining to shed and she will experience a "period" without shedding a fertilized egg. Most commercial birth control pills, if not all, are doses of progesterone, estrogen, or both and prevent the body from fertilizing eggs and releasing them. Emergency contraceptives are larger doses of birth control pills and often cause some or all of the following: it stops the body from fertilizing an egg, or thins the uterine lining and prevents the fertilized embryo from attaching to the uterus wall.
Back to story:
So that was pretty much it. We've been using barrier contraceptives more and more often (read every time now) (and by barrier contraceptives, I mean male condoms). It's a lot cleaner (no run-off down my leg), and a lot easier to pack up. Ooh! So the other day, I had my first bout of sex while under the influence. It was interesting: we were both super difficult. It took ME forever to get to any semblance of release myself. Yeah, that's pretty much the run-down of my sex life...Just this is it times maybe 5 on my side of the computer screen.
-Breathless
Scarlet Bloodmoon
Okay, this one is a little bit more about my sexuality and level of sexual activity. General disclaimer.
So I got back from Taiwan, it was great, solid week of hedonism. Like, at least once every day for seven days. At the end, Plan B. First time I've ever taken synthetic hormones intentionally, and definitely something I didn't dread or feel weird about like I thought I might about a year ago. Maybe it was the person, or the fact that it might have been I was really fertile this time. Definitely learned some lessons, and when the progesterone wears off, I'm for sure going onto watch.
I guess this sounds a tad vague...
Okay. Run down of the reproductive stuff I was talking about:
Firstly, every girl has cycles. It's like a rollercoaster that hardly changes. Sometimes, there are unexpected failures and riders are stuck in the middle for like an hour, but it hardly happens. Typically, the first day of the cycle is counted as the first day of a girl's period. The published average is 28 days per cycle, but that's totally off for most people. About half-way into the cycle, the girl is the most fertile during that cycle. This is a five day window and unprotected sex is going to lead to pregnancy in most cases. It depends on the girl, and there are many ways to tell without having to buy fertility tests. The period before that window, and after the window are safe days for unprotected without any reproduction. (As a side note, sperm can probably last about 3 days if conditions are slightly fertile. 5 is the safe number to work for, but it's sacrificing two days of clumsy teenage trying. The fertile egg window is about a day, so the window is three or four days before ovulation and the day after. For getting pregnant, if the couple is willing, sex all five days will definitely increase those chances.)
Some ways to tell about fertility are the Basal Body Temperature method where waking body temperatures are charted each morning and compared to show when ovulation has occured. The highest temperature recorded in a cycle is when the female is most fertile. This method only works to identify fertility after it has past, so it is often used to prevent pregnancy. Another method would be to observe cervical fluid. This fluid is different from arousal fluid in many ways. It is produced from the cervix and often is the main liquid transport system for sperm in the vagina. The fluid will vary in consistancy, color, and taste and by identifying the fluid, it can help in monitoring fertility. At a woman's most fertile time, the fluid is clear, almost tasteless, and as the consistancy of egg whites. It is really thick, stretchy. In a woman's most unfertile times, she will be dry, or have a crumbly, yellow or milky fluid that usually tastes sour. The last common way to monitor fertility is by the positioning of the cervix.
Birth control and hormones are ways to regulate the reproductive system artificially. By using birth control that contains hormones, the body's natural hormones are overridden and the synthetic hormones regulate the body's cycle. Commercial birth control usually use a 28 day cycle and give the girl a week of placebos that allow the uterine lining to shed and she will experience a "period" without shedding a fertilized egg. Most commercial birth control pills, if not all, are doses of progesterone, estrogen, or both and prevent the body from fertilizing eggs and releasing them. Emergency contraceptives are larger doses of birth control pills and often cause some or all of the following: it stops the body from fertilizing an egg, or thins the uterine lining and prevents the fertilized embryo from attaching to the uterus wall.
Back to story:
So that was pretty much it. We've been using barrier contraceptives more and more often (read every time now) (and by barrier contraceptives, I mean male condoms). It's a lot cleaner (no run-off down my leg), and a lot easier to pack up. Ooh! So the other day, I had my first bout of sex while under the influence. It was interesting: we were both super difficult. It took ME forever to get to any semblance of release myself. Yeah, that's pretty much the run-down of my sex life...Just this is it times maybe 5 on my side of the computer screen.
-Breathless
Scarlet Bloodmoon
Thursday, June 11, 2009
15 hours
It's kind of boring being on the computer when I'm fifteen hours ahead of everyone else I would talk to. Facebook is incredibly slow at night because it is 5 in the morning and everyone has just fallen asleep. The people I would want to talk to are also in bed, and there is nothing to do because everything is just as it was when I refresh things. So when I'm doing things in the day, it'd be the optimal time to talk to people. Late at night, the people I don't talk to are seeded out due to the late hour, and the people I'm fine with talking to are still up. Things are still buzzing on the internets I monitor. When I come home, no one is awake. Nothing is happening. The waters are silent.
My trip has been great. I've been super emotional, seen people I can hardly remember and those I remember clearly. I've heard so many stories and flipped through so many memories...We haven't gone anywhere dreadfully exciting, nor have I seen anything so shocking I am now scarred for life. Everything is just...normal but different.
I am becoming more girly. Maybe it's because I'm further away, or because I'm becoming a newer person, or something entirely else, but my aunt has said I'm becoming more of a Taiwanese girl. My style is slowly fading into that of those around me. I've fully realized I am an adult. We were out for dinner one night with family and family's family. This little girl of maybe 5 from the extended family was playing around the front of the restaurant with her brother of like 1.5 after the meal and I was sent to watch them because I was falling asleep anyways. She called my the equivalent of miss that most would use for adults. Like, she didn't call me Sister like every teen girl introduces themselves as, but Miss. I hesitated a bit in my mind. Wait...do I qualify to be called Miss? When did this happen? Is that the correct term? Holy fuck.
Also, it would seem everyone is out to marry me off. It started when we went to my great aunt's. She had asked how old I was and after hearing the response, said that I should be marrying soon. Then, we went to the Air Force Academy where my aunt's sister-in-law tries to match me with her Australian step son and says that Australian guys are very good at listening to what their women want and are very interested in Asian girls. Mental chuckle. After that, about half a week later, we go to this ancient temple that has been there about 400 years and we pass by the shrine the the minor deity responsible for marriage and all of the stuff before that. My mom urges me to go and pray and take the steps required for such. Wait...No! I don't want to be married yet, and I definitely don't want to be set up with a 26 year old engineer in Australia that I've never spoken to...
People...
So pretty much, while I have been here, it's been a lot of talking to people, going out to eat, walking to places, using the public transportation system, and sightseeing. I'm just really glad I've gotten this opportunity to come back and see these people; especially since the last time I came back was for one of my uncles' wedding and that was twelve years ago! Fun stuff.
-Someone should talk to me...
Scarlet Bloodmoon
My trip has been great. I've been super emotional, seen people I can hardly remember and those I remember clearly. I've heard so many stories and flipped through so many memories...We haven't gone anywhere dreadfully exciting, nor have I seen anything so shocking I am now scarred for life. Everything is just...normal but different.
I am becoming more girly. Maybe it's because I'm further away, or because I'm becoming a newer person, or something entirely else, but my aunt has said I'm becoming more of a Taiwanese girl. My style is slowly fading into that of those around me. I've fully realized I am an adult. We were out for dinner one night with family and family's family. This little girl of maybe 5 from the extended family was playing around the front of the restaurant with her brother of like 1.5 after the meal and I was sent to watch them because I was falling asleep anyways. She called my the equivalent of miss that most would use for adults. Like, she didn't call me Sister like every teen girl introduces themselves as, but Miss. I hesitated a bit in my mind. Wait...do I qualify to be called Miss? When did this happen? Is that the correct term? Holy fuck.
Also, it would seem everyone is out to marry me off. It started when we went to my great aunt's. She had asked how old I was and after hearing the response, said that I should be marrying soon. Then, we went to the Air Force Academy where my aunt's sister-in-law tries to match me with her Australian step son and says that Australian guys are very good at listening to what their women want and are very interested in Asian girls. Mental chuckle. After that, about half a week later, we go to this ancient temple that has been there about 400 years and we pass by the shrine the the minor deity responsible for marriage and all of the stuff before that. My mom urges me to go and pray and take the steps required for such. Wait...No! I don't want to be married yet, and I definitely don't want to be set up with a 26 year old engineer in Australia that I've never spoken to...
People...
So pretty much, while I have been here, it's been a lot of talking to people, going out to eat, walking to places, using the public transportation system, and sightseeing. I'm just really glad I've gotten this opportunity to come back and see these people; especially since the last time I came back was for one of my uncles' wedding and that was twelve years ago! Fun stuff.
-Someone should talk to me...
Scarlet Bloodmoon
Friday, May 29, 2009
Technology Blurb
So, the integration of technology has become impressive. People now can sms blog posts straight to their websites. No longer do people have to be on a laptop or computer to connect to people around the world. How cool is that?
Thursday, May 7, 2009
Surrender
AP testing has been a huge bitch. It's totally my fault that I'm taking so many, but I've missed so many classes that I will end up having to make it up. Gross.
So, most people agree that this poem is now one of their favorites:
To an Inconstant One
Sir Robert Ayton
I LOVED thee once; I'll love no more--
Thine be the grief as is the blame;
Thou art not what thou wast before,
What reason I should be the same?
He that can love unloved again,
Hath better store of love than brain:
God send me love my debts to pay,
While unthrifts fool their love away!
Nothing could have my love o'erthrown
If thou hadst still continued mine;
Yea, if thou hadst remain'd thy own,
I might perchance have yet been thine.
But thou thy freedom didst recall
That it thou might elsewhere enthral:
And then how could I but disdain
A captive's captive to remain?
When new desires had conquer'd thee
And changed the object of thy will,
It had been lethargy in me,
Not constancy, to love thee still.
Yea, it had been a sin to go
And prostitute affection so:
Since we are taught no prayers to say
To such as must to others pray.
Yet do thou glory in thy choice--
Thy choice of his good fortune boast;
I'll neither grieve nor yet rejoice
To see him gain what I have lost:
The height of my disdain shall be
To laugh at him, to blush for thee;
To love thee still, but go no more
A-begging at a beggar's door.
I have more and more evidence to suggest that this girl is really bad at relationships. It was first brought up Junior year that the relationship she was in was empty and just surface and I had been warned to keep my relationship not like that one. She later excitedly told people the day before Valentine's Day that she was single. Today, I had someone confirm that she is uber flirty and nothing she really does actually reflects how she feels at all. All of her guy friends at one point or another take interest in her. It is never real for her.
This little bit made me happy. I may be really picky and still flirt with strangers, but I at least go through steps and tests to determine candidacy. She doesn't do that, she just plays. How very...Karma.
-I still need to make a new password...
Scarlet Bloodmoon
So, most people agree that this poem is now one of their favorites:
To an Inconstant One
Sir Robert Ayton
I LOVED thee once; I'll love no more--
Thine be the grief as is the blame;
Thou art not what thou wast before,
What reason I should be the same?
He that can love unloved again,
Hath better store of love than brain:
God send me love my debts to pay,
While unthrifts fool their love away!
Nothing could have my love o'erthrown
If thou hadst still continued mine;
Yea, if thou hadst remain'd thy own,
I might perchance have yet been thine.
But thou thy freedom didst recall
That it thou might elsewhere enthral:
And then how could I but disdain
A captive's captive to remain?
When new desires had conquer'd thee
And changed the object of thy will,
It had been lethargy in me,
Not constancy, to love thee still.
Yea, it had been a sin to go
And prostitute affection so:
Since we are taught no prayers to say
To such as must to others pray.
Yet do thou glory in thy choice--
Thy choice of his good fortune boast;
I'll neither grieve nor yet rejoice
To see him gain what I have lost:
The height of my disdain shall be
To laugh at him, to blush for thee;
To love thee still, but go no more
A-begging at a beggar's door.
I have more and more evidence to suggest that this girl is really bad at relationships. It was first brought up Junior year that the relationship she was in was empty and just surface and I had been warned to keep my relationship not like that one. She later excitedly told people the day before Valentine's Day that she was single. Today, I had someone confirm that she is uber flirty and nothing she really does actually reflects how she feels at all. All of her guy friends at one point or another take interest in her. It is never real for her.
This little bit made me happy. I may be really picky and still flirt with strangers, but I at least go through steps and tests to determine candidacy. She doesn't do that, she just plays. How very...Karma.
-I still need to make a new password...
Scarlet Bloodmoon
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Burnt
4/26/09
So, like two or three weeks ago, I finally gave up. Like, seriously, gave up on school. So, pretty much, slacked off on homework, started not paying as much attention in classes to the point where like three classes actually still matter to me. And so, I've spent the past two or three weeks doing things.
In other news, my phone epic died and I'm supposed to be getting a new one soon ish.
4/28/09
I am so done with school....I can't wait to be out of here...I can't wait to move out. That would be pretty silly to see people actually doing stuff for once. I am absolutely done with being the person that makes everything work. Good luck keeping order in a house of four males and five people total!
I can't wait to be done here. Like, I can seriously do the whole living away from home, but housing is expensive! I don't even really have enough right now to do tuition! Fucking economy...
Oh, so I'm going to Mormon prom. It will be interesting. Maybe I should try to find something where they won't ban me at the door for wearing...But it's not my fault I'm comfortable in my own skin! Everyone else just has to be jealous and self-conscious, and religion just has to kill any sex drive because that frustration motivates people. Fuck that.
-Neh, done
Scarlet Bloodmoon
So, like two or three weeks ago, I finally gave up. Like, seriously, gave up on school. So, pretty much, slacked off on homework, started not paying as much attention in classes to the point where like three classes actually still matter to me. And so, I've spent the past two or three weeks doing things.
In other news, my phone epic died and I'm supposed to be getting a new one soon ish.
4/28/09
I am so done with school....I can't wait to be out of here...I can't wait to move out. That would be pretty silly to see people actually doing stuff for once. I am absolutely done with being the person that makes everything work. Good luck keeping order in a house of four males and five people total!
I can't wait to be done here. Like, I can seriously do the whole living away from home, but housing is expensive! I don't even really have enough right now to do tuition! Fucking economy...
Oh, so I'm going to Mormon prom. It will be interesting. Maybe I should try to find something where they won't ban me at the door for wearing...But it's not my fault I'm comfortable in my own skin! Everyone else just has to be jealous and self-conscious, and religion just has to kill any sex drive because that frustration motivates people. Fuck that.
-Neh, done
Scarlet Bloodmoon
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Closer
Bleh. So I guess, all this week, the most interesting thing that happened was...Monday. Senior ditch day, went to my first three classes and then went home. That was great fun. James came home with me, we had some lunch, watched some TV before ice cream of the nonfrozen persuasion and then taking a nap. We woke up after like three hours on the couch, significantly more sweaty than when we fell asleep. We went back to school, got his car, and then drove down to Downtown Chandler to get new tires for my car. Like four hours later, I get home, go pick up my car from the auto shop, and then come home to do some stuff on the internet.
So, today is the 19th. A year ago, lots of things happened. I got kicked out of my house, walked to Bari's, saw Sweeny Todd with her family, went out to dinner with her family, and then went to a friend's birthday party. Anyways, you can go back a year to that post.
Went swimming today. I should really do my homework...
-Neh
Scarlet Bloodmoon
So, today is the 19th. A year ago, lots of things happened. I got kicked out of my house, walked to Bari's, saw Sweeny Todd with her family, went out to dinner with her family, and then went to a friend's birthday party. Anyways, you can go back a year to that post.
Went swimming today. I should really do my homework...
-Neh
Scarlet Bloodmoon
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
