I have to confess, this seems like the end to a slight and very short run for my journal of exploits and scandal. I doubt anything noteworthy would come from my current relationship so all this blog will become would have to be a place where I can rant about the things that bug me about my best friend (who still doesn't know about the blog...and as time goes on and I destroy her character online, I don't want her to know about the blog. I don't want her to know that I want to staple her mouth shut on some occasions and want to shout at her for assuming she's so good at things when I know I could find six year olds who can do the same quality of work) and flutter all over the fun and exciting things that happen to me. I have to confess, this is the end of the chronicling of the silly things that I do for awhile at least.
...I don't know if how I worded my post meant I was planning to stop writing, but I see now that I can't stop. There is something that grows inside me every time something exciting or silly happens to me and I just have to write. I itch to write about the things that bug me or the things that make me proud of myself. I want people to be proud of me and the only thing that I hold that really does that is this blog. I don't know if I feel proud of every moment, but I know that moments do come here to show the online world that Scarlet Bloodmoon is a force to be dealt with and has these proud moments. This blog won't die because I have no more scandals to write about. This blog will crumble when I don't have the time to love and care for it. So until I cannot, I will write like this blog is my child and my words sustain and feed her.
Never to fear, my loves, I will not stop indulging you on the critical and cynical musings of Scarlet Bloodmoon
-I'm Sorry To Leave, But Nothing In The World Can Keep Me Here
Scarlet Bloodmoon
Sunday, April 27, 2008
Monday, April 21, 2008
Now I Wear The Biggest Smile
Life is fine and dandy with Scarlet right now. Wrapping up two days of not being single anymore (eventually, I will stop counting...) and all I can say is "Damn, I am one lucky girl."
I'm not going to lie, Bella and my relationships tend to have fairly close "anniversary dates". Her anniversaries are on the 24th and mine was the 31/30/29/28 (end of the month I guess). Now, mine are the 19th and she still has the 24th. Apparently, it takes people towards the end of months to gather up the remaining amount of doubt and just ask me out.
Talking to Otter on Sunday and with Bella in the car, we finally started telling people James and I were going out.
Bella: "They're official now, by the way"
Otter is confused.
Bella: "Scarlet and James, they are official."
Otter: "Oh! Finally! Took him long enough. I asked him about it not long ago, it was like 'so what's with you and Scarlet?' He said 'we're just friends.' Jeez, took him long enough."
Me: "Like the better part of four months?" (It's true. We've been spending too much time together since January 5th for Robotics.)
Otter: "Well, it's only been really bad for the past month and a half."
It was kind of amusing, because looking back, yeah...that was when it all kind of started to seem like a relationship. That was when we started diving head first into spending EVERY day with each other. *Shrugs*
You know what's silly is now Bella says she'll feel awkward and like a third wheel around James and I. The only thing we've added to the random amounts of silliness we do is kissing...and fairly prolonged hugs. I mean, I've had to endure seven months of her talking about a boyfriend and her being with her boyfriend while I was single. Now that I have a relationship with a person who spends more time with me in the past four months of not dating than her boyfriend has in the past six months of dating her, she feels like a third wheel and needs to remind us that she's sick and tired of us being close. Every time we're being cute and silly and just leaning against each other, it's "Stop making out!" or "Stop making babies!" Okay. First off, you're the ones running off to your room, locking the door, and turning on the TV. Does that not scream "We're doing something (or rather, each other) that we're not supposed to?" We're not making out, we're not making babies (does it look like we're hurriedly undressing just to put on a show for you?) and we are not going to stop being annoying like that. Just because you're not getting "You're so cute" every other ten minutes doesn't mean you have to snap at us because I'm getting compliments.
I also hate how Bella gets so offended when James and Otter pretend to be gay for each other. "Sloppy seconds" comments are tossed around and Bella pulls this offended pout thing and tries to rope Otter to her side. Seriously, I'm laughing at the two, egging them on because it's hilarious. Bella is complaining because Otter apparently is spending too much time with his other friends. "What? I thought you loved me," she would say, sounding wounded. Another sloppy-seconds comment and she would pull a deeper pout. Rolling my eyes like a ninja, I step in and make the "I'm getting sloppy seconds too, just shush" comment and James laughs at it. He knows how much chatter goes on behind her back and how many people just want to like smother her some days. In fact, we do most of the talking and the needing to smother. She just cares way too much about having a perfect boyfriend and just needed a male enough to settle with anyone and crave to fix his every flaw.
I find it hilarious that James had to force Otter to spend time with Bella. Seriously, Otter had the choice of Guitar Hero 3 for the Wii and spending time with her. It's obviously not going to work well if someone else has to force you to pick your girlfriend over a game that you have at home. They've hit a year, three months, and a day and seriously, James and I were joking about sabotaging the relationship because it would be easier for all of us. Bella would find someone who thought like a girl and could give her all the attention she craves (and she craves more attention than a newborn) and live her happy and romantic life while James and I wouldn't need to hear about how horrible this new guy was because he will be essentially perfect. I personally think Bella is afraid of change so she won't leave Otter, but only went out with him because she was desperate for a relationship. She ended a relationship at three months because he wasn't the best for her, and now, Otter is starting to act a lot like the other one. I'm thinking one of the other reasons is that they've bonded physically to a point where it'd be awkward afterwards. It's gone past a point of return and it'd tear apart a group of people. Hey, I think we should have bets as to how long this relationship is going to last.
I was different. I apparently attract really good guys. Sure, there are some bad ones, and most the time, I know when they are bad and most the time, I know I'm not serious, but they could be. I had a really full relationship before this one and when that ended, I pulled away, was immature, and got back on the horse. This relationship...he's a nerd. He's a very well-rounded nerd that can definitely teach me a lot. Musically inclined too...I win. Sure, I sort of settle with what I get, but I'm also apathetic enough to ignore flaws...and that's a personal character flaw. I tend to ignore too much sometimes. I don't want to change them, I just want them to acknowledge me as someone more than sex or arm candy and actually give as much as they want to take. I also tend to date really close friends, people who I've gotten to know. If they pass the qualities test, they are in for the picking.
I'm not going to lie, I have (and already two days in, it's kind of sad that I can already tell) a better relationship than the one Bella has with Otter. Sure, James seems a tad clingy, but I don't mind. It hasn't been suffocating yet and it's comfortable. I couldn't care, he's musically inclined, a fantasy/sci-fi nerd, and in two of the clubs I'm in. He used to play cello and upright bass, and really, he's just...wonderful. I really think that I hit gold on this one. It's so easy to tell that James is the kind of boyfriend that Bella had wanted out of Otter. He's constantly there and it almost seems like he's reluctant to leave me.
-Patience, My Love, Is A Virtue
Scarlet Bloodmoon
Title From: Misery Business by Paramore
I'm not going to lie, Bella and my relationships tend to have fairly close "anniversary dates". Her anniversaries are on the 24th and mine was the 31/30/29/28 (end of the month I guess). Now, mine are the 19th and she still has the 24th. Apparently, it takes people towards the end of months to gather up the remaining amount of doubt and just ask me out.
Talking to Otter on Sunday and with Bella in the car, we finally started telling people James and I were going out.
Bella: "They're official now, by the way"
Otter is confused.
Bella: "Scarlet and James, they are official."
Otter: "Oh! Finally! Took him long enough. I asked him about it not long ago, it was like 'so what's with you and Scarlet?' He said 'we're just friends.' Jeez, took him long enough."
Me: "Like the better part of four months?" (It's true. We've been spending too much time together since January 5th for Robotics.)
Otter: "Well, it's only been really bad for the past month and a half."
It was kind of amusing, because looking back, yeah...that was when it all kind of started to seem like a relationship. That was when we started diving head first into spending EVERY day with each other. *Shrugs*
You know what's silly is now Bella says she'll feel awkward and like a third wheel around James and I. The only thing we've added to the random amounts of silliness we do is kissing...and fairly prolonged hugs. I mean, I've had to endure seven months of her talking about a boyfriend and her being with her boyfriend while I was single. Now that I have a relationship with a person who spends more time with me in the past four months of not dating than her boyfriend has in the past six months of dating her, she feels like a third wheel and needs to remind us that she's sick and tired of us being close. Every time we're being cute and silly and just leaning against each other, it's "Stop making out!" or "Stop making babies!" Okay. First off, you're the ones running off to your room, locking the door, and turning on the TV. Does that not scream "We're doing something (or rather, each other) that we're not supposed to?" We're not making out, we're not making babies (does it look like we're hurriedly undressing just to put on a show for you?) and we are not going to stop being annoying like that. Just because you're not getting "You're so cute" every other ten minutes doesn't mean you have to snap at us because I'm getting compliments.
I also hate how Bella gets so offended when James and Otter pretend to be gay for each other. "Sloppy seconds" comments are tossed around and Bella pulls this offended pout thing and tries to rope Otter to her side. Seriously, I'm laughing at the two, egging them on because it's hilarious. Bella is complaining because Otter apparently is spending too much time with his other friends. "What? I thought you loved me," she would say, sounding wounded. Another sloppy-seconds comment and she would pull a deeper pout. Rolling my eyes like a ninja, I step in and make the "I'm getting sloppy seconds too, just shush" comment and James laughs at it. He knows how much chatter goes on behind her back and how many people just want to like smother her some days. In fact, we do most of the talking and the needing to smother. She just cares way too much about having a perfect boyfriend and just needed a male enough to settle with anyone and crave to fix his every flaw.
I find it hilarious that James had to force Otter to spend time with Bella. Seriously, Otter had the choice of Guitar Hero 3 for the Wii and spending time with her. It's obviously not going to work well if someone else has to force you to pick your girlfriend over a game that you have at home. They've hit a year, three months, and a day and seriously, James and I were joking about sabotaging the relationship because it would be easier for all of us. Bella would find someone who thought like a girl and could give her all the attention she craves (and she craves more attention than a newborn) and live her happy and romantic life while James and I wouldn't need to hear about how horrible this new guy was because he will be essentially perfect. I personally think Bella is afraid of change so she won't leave Otter, but only went out with him because she was desperate for a relationship. She ended a relationship at three months because he wasn't the best for her, and now, Otter is starting to act a lot like the other one. I'm thinking one of the other reasons is that they've bonded physically to a point where it'd be awkward afterwards. It's gone past a point of return and it'd tear apart a group of people. Hey, I think we should have bets as to how long this relationship is going to last.
I was different. I apparently attract really good guys. Sure, there are some bad ones, and most the time, I know when they are bad and most the time, I know I'm not serious, but they could be. I had a really full relationship before this one and when that ended, I pulled away, was immature, and got back on the horse. This relationship...he's a nerd. He's a very well-rounded nerd that can definitely teach me a lot. Musically inclined too...I win. Sure, I sort of settle with what I get, but I'm also apathetic enough to ignore flaws...and that's a personal character flaw. I tend to ignore too much sometimes. I don't want to change them, I just want them to acknowledge me as someone more than sex or arm candy and actually give as much as they want to take. I also tend to date really close friends, people who I've gotten to know. If they pass the qualities test, they are in for the picking.
I'm not going to lie, I have (and already two days in, it's kind of sad that I can already tell) a better relationship than the one Bella has with Otter. Sure, James seems a tad clingy, but I don't mind. It hasn't been suffocating yet and it's comfortable. I couldn't care, he's musically inclined, a fantasy/sci-fi nerd, and in two of the clubs I'm in. He used to play cello and upright bass, and really, he's just...wonderful. I really think that I hit gold on this one. It's so easy to tell that James is the kind of boyfriend that Bella had wanted out of Otter. He's constantly there and it almost seems like he's reluctant to leave me.
-Patience, My Love, Is A Virtue
Scarlet Bloodmoon
Title From: Misery Business by Paramore
Saturday, April 19, 2008
Pride...
I've decided pride has to be my worst sin. I get small bubbles from time to time, and when the big guns hit, I get way cocky. Friday was fun, and that day, I hadn't seen James until...third period. I was carrying a huge poster board thing so I had to have people hold doors and alert me when I was about to smack someone with the board. Well, Calculus went alright, I half paid attention and still understood the lesson, but neh. As class got out, James and another friend were waiting outside the door for me (and well, another girl too, but eh.) We joked about how he let go of the door when I was heading out (which was an amusing tangent) and then headed off to lunch. More being cute and making people mad when we got cuddly, and then lunch ended. James walked me halfway to physics and it was an amusing class. We had a test that we all later learned we failed the last two questions.
Class ended and I traveled to meet a group of people. James was a little late, carrying an extra backpack. It was Bella's who was just behind him. We trekked to our cars and just before we got there, I wondered aloud where my keys were. James commented that they were probably in the ignition, joking about it. They were. We laughed at how silly I was and it was a good thing that this was the Mormon building so no one would steal it. We went to the library, pulling into the parking lot. We stood around and chatted with people until they all went away. Then, James and I traveled to his house and was greeted by his mother. We watched August Rush and The Illusionist which was fun. August Rush pissed me off because of all the musical inaccuracies and storybook ending and The Illusionist was fun. I had already seen the end, so the whole effect was lost on me. After that, Bella was done cooking with her grandparents for Passover so we headed over to her house and left for dinner. We went to a Mexican restaurant we had previously went to with another friend who moved to Texas. It was alright, but not good. We decided that we weren't going to go back.
After going back to Bella's house, we lounged around for a long time, reading off interesting lists of top tens and trying to watch a movie. My parents called, angry and a little bit rawry and demanded I go home, but lazy, I stayed there, curled against James. Eventually, I offered to give him a ride home (since we took my car from his house) and then headed back. My parents got even more rawry by the time I got home and took away a lot of conveniences. I picked up a few things in my room, ranted a little, chatted with James a little, and then went to bed.
Saturday morning, I woke up to my dad yelling at my 16 year old brother for playing video games. He then came into my room and told me to clean up before I left for a science fair thing. I told him that he should tell my 14 year old brother that he might not be picked up at 8:40 like we planned the night before but probably closer to 10. He yelled at me and called me selfish and trying to manipulate the situation and I called him selfish for not considering Daniel and making him suffer for something the didn't do. I said that I could commit suicide and he wouldn't care. Then, he threw me out of the house for threatening him. I was out the front door in a camisole, jeans, and had no shoes. Fed up, I walked to Bella's house. Her parents had went out to pick up Bella's younger sister and when I got there, Bella was asleep. I went downstairs for a little bit and played with the dogs and finally, went to wake her up. I cried a little while telling her that I ran away from home and then we went downstairs for food and TV. We started the Libertine while she went to take a shower (and really, that was an amusing movie from the half that I saw). Her parents came back and we talked it out a little and they decided to kidnap me for the day and take me out to a musical with them. Before the musical started, we went to a really nifty store called Buffalo Exchange or something along those lines and Bella and I managed to find shirts and pants for a dollar each! Exciting! I got a pair of bondage pants that we all thought were very amusing. Score! They had really cute skirts too, but they were too big. Bella said I was mean for complaining that the skirts were too big. Eh.
We went to Gammage to see Sweeny Todd and while it was an alright musical, the instruments made me happy. The storyline was hard to understand with the way they did everything, but I liked it...for a high school calibre play. It wasn't though...
Dinner was interesting. We went to downtown Chandler to a brewery and sat down to eat. Bella and I split two appetizers and then her and her sister decided to wander so I followed them. We ogled the lingerie store slightly and lamented when the bridal shop (with interesting dresses) was closed. There were some spiffy shops in that stretch. We headed home and then changed clothes. James showed up soon after and we dropped off Bella's sister and her friend and went to a friend's birthday gathering thing. By the time we got there, half of the people were leaving (eh.) and so we hung around until her sisters left and then went to the park.
The first four people there got onto swings (which was fun) and after not wanting to walk on the wood chips, James carried me to the sand. Otter almost commanded James to take his shoes off and so I was transferred to Otter while James pried his shoes off. Protesting and wanting to be let down, Otter tried to make me uncomfortable by pretending to drop me. Jerk. Well, he finally set me down and James wandered over from the wall he was leaning for support on. We decided to play Hot Lava Monster and we did for awhile. Some of the people weren't very good and so basically, people would get into a spot that was kind of hard to get to and then sit there. James and I claimed the space leading to the spiral slide and we stayed there for awhile.
After a whole ton of holding hands and being couple-y and cute, James leaned a tad closer and conversation ensued:
"Hey [Scarlet], I've been thinking...This is practically a relationship."
"Yeah," We were talking in hushed murmur-esque tones so anything sounded like I was hanging to his every word.
"Do you want to make this a full relationship?" Here, my mind was screaming. This was the one person I focussed on getting, the one person I thought would be hard to get. He was the one with commitment and trust issues (well, probably not trust, he said he trusted me). No way. Someone pinch me.
"If you wanted," I replied. To me, it sounded nonchalant and apathetic...like I couldn't care less. I smiled, trying to make that feeling go away. I really do care!
"I really do." NO WAY...this is just too good...
"Okay," I was giggly at this point.
So, that was the giddiest conversation I've had in like...four or five months? Yeah. Silently rocking out because I am no longer single and I've only really told one person. I have a wonderful life! Yeah, so we then spent the rest of the time like...attached. It was just silly.
On the way home, (since he drove us around) he let me drive the huge minivan thing he brought along. It was so very amusing. I was going around 65 on a 45 mph street at one point. We laughed about it. We laughed about a lot of things, really...At my driveway, we both got out of the car (well, he had to get to the driver's seat, right?) and so as I was leaving, he gave me a super long hug. We "planned" something for the next weekend ("since I've seen you for three weeks straight before.") and finally, after like...three minutes of not wanting to leave each other, a random tag out of nowhere (haha it was funny), and at least two "I love you"s, I turned and left him. I guess, in a way, I already do love him, but so far, I've just meant it as an extended friendly thing. I know he's good for me, I trust him, and I'd give up anything to help him, so I guess, in another way, I love him. I don't know, what does Love mean? There were so many places where, going back, I could have easily kissed him or he could have easily kissed me, but I don't want it to go that quickly. I mean, sure, we could say that we've been really close for a longer time, but I don't want to repeat past relationships that were definitely flawed. The evening was silly and fun, and I'll see him tomorrow though, so it's not like harsh.
-I Never Thought Tonight Would Be Like This
Scarlet Bloodmoon
Class ended and I traveled to meet a group of people. James was a little late, carrying an extra backpack. It was Bella's who was just behind him. We trekked to our cars and just before we got there, I wondered aloud where my keys were. James commented that they were probably in the ignition, joking about it. They were. We laughed at how silly I was and it was a good thing that this was the Mormon building so no one would steal it. We went to the library, pulling into the parking lot. We stood around and chatted with people until they all went away. Then, James and I traveled to his house and was greeted by his mother. We watched August Rush and The Illusionist which was fun. August Rush pissed me off because of all the musical inaccuracies and storybook ending and The Illusionist was fun. I had already seen the end, so the whole effect was lost on me. After that, Bella was done cooking with her grandparents for Passover so we headed over to her house and left for dinner. We went to a Mexican restaurant we had previously went to with another friend who moved to Texas. It was alright, but not good. We decided that we weren't going to go back.
After going back to Bella's house, we lounged around for a long time, reading off interesting lists of top tens and trying to watch a movie. My parents called, angry and a little bit rawry and demanded I go home, but lazy, I stayed there, curled against James. Eventually, I offered to give him a ride home (since we took my car from his house) and then headed back. My parents got even more rawry by the time I got home and took away a lot of conveniences. I picked up a few things in my room, ranted a little, chatted with James a little, and then went to bed.
Saturday morning, I woke up to my dad yelling at my 16 year old brother for playing video games. He then came into my room and told me to clean up before I left for a science fair thing. I told him that he should tell my 14 year old brother that he might not be picked up at 8:40 like we planned the night before but probably closer to 10. He yelled at me and called me selfish and trying to manipulate the situation and I called him selfish for not considering Daniel and making him suffer for something the didn't do. I said that I could commit suicide and he wouldn't care. Then, he threw me out of the house for threatening him. I was out the front door in a camisole, jeans, and had no shoes. Fed up, I walked to Bella's house. Her parents had went out to pick up Bella's younger sister and when I got there, Bella was asleep. I went downstairs for a little bit and played with the dogs and finally, went to wake her up. I cried a little while telling her that I ran away from home and then we went downstairs for food and TV. We started the Libertine while she went to take a shower (and really, that was an amusing movie from the half that I saw). Her parents came back and we talked it out a little and they decided to kidnap me for the day and take me out to a musical with them. Before the musical started, we went to a really nifty store called Buffalo Exchange or something along those lines and Bella and I managed to find shirts and pants for a dollar each! Exciting! I got a pair of bondage pants that we all thought were very amusing. Score! They had really cute skirts too, but they were too big. Bella said I was mean for complaining that the skirts were too big. Eh.
We went to Gammage to see Sweeny Todd and while it was an alright musical, the instruments made me happy. The storyline was hard to understand with the way they did everything, but I liked it...for a high school calibre play. It wasn't though...
Dinner was interesting. We went to downtown Chandler to a brewery and sat down to eat. Bella and I split two appetizers and then her and her sister decided to wander so I followed them. We ogled the lingerie store slightly and lamented when the bridal shop (with interesting dresses) was closed. There were some spiffy shops in that stretch. We headed home and then changed clothes. James showed up soon after and we dropped off Bella's sister and her friend and went to a friend's birthday gathering thing. By the time we got there, half of the people were leaving (eh.) and so we hung around until her sisters left and then went to the park.
The first four people there got onto swings (which was fun) and after not wanting to walk on the wood chips, James carried me to the sand. Otter almost commanded James to take his shoes off and so I was transferred to Otter while James pried his shoes off. Protesting and wanting to be let down, Otter tried to make me uncomfortable by pretending to drop me. Jerk. Well, he finally set me down and James wandered over from the wall he was leaning for support on. We decided to play Hot Lava Monster and we did for awhile. Some of the people weren't very good and so basically, people would get into a spot that was kind of hard to get to and then sit there. James and I claimed the space leading to the spiral slide and we stayed there for awhile.
After a whole ton of holding hands and being couple-y and cute, James leaned a tad closer and conversation ensued:
"Hey [Scarlet], I've been thinking...This is practically a relationship."
"Yeah," We were talking in hushed murmur-esque tones so anything sounded like I was hanging to his every word.
"Do you want to make this a full relationship?" Here, my mind was screaming. This was the one person I focussed on getting, the one person I thought would be hard to get. He was the one with commitment and trust issues (well, probably not trust, he said he trusted me). No way. Someone pinch me.
"If you wanted," I replied. To me, it sounded nonchalant and apathetic...like I couldn't care less. I smiled, trying to make that feeling go away. I really do care!
"I really do." NO WAY...this is just too good...
"Okay," I was giggly at this point.
So, that was the giddiest conversation I've had in like...four or five months? Yeah. Silently rocking out because I am no longer single and I've only really told one person. I have a wonderful life! Yeah, so we then spent the rest of the time like...attached. It was just silly.
On the way home, (since he drove us around) he let me drive the huge minivan thing he brought along. It was so very amusing. I was going around 65 on a 45 mph street at one point. We laughed about it. We laughed about a lot of things, really...At my driveway, we both got out of the car (well, he had to get to the driver's seat, right?) and so as I was leaving, he gave me a super long hug. We "planned" something for the next weekend ("since I've seen you for three weeks straight before.") and finally, after like...three minutes of not wanting to leave each other, a random tag out of nowhere (haha it was funny), and at least two "I love you"s, I turned and left him. I guess, in a way, I already do love him, but so far, I've just meant it as an extended friendly thing. I know he's good for me, I trust him, and I'd give up anything to help him, so I guess, in another way, I love him. I don't know, what does Love mean? There were so many places where, going back, I could have easily kissed him or he could have easily kissed me, but I don't want it to go that quickly. I mean, sure, we could say that we've been really close for a longer time, but I don't want to repeat past relationships that were definitely flawed. The evening was silly and fun, and I'll see him tomorrow though, so it's not like harsh.
-I Never Thought Tonight Would Be Like This
Scarlet Bloodmoon
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Have You Ever Noticed, That I'm Not Acting Like I Used to Do Before
Almost a week since the last time I've told you about my life...
April 7th was another of my brothers' birthdays. We didn't do much and the only thing I really remember of that day was that I bought my ticket to the prom. Tuesday and Wednesday were half days where we got the afternoon to ourselves, so Bella, James and I had an adventure. Otter joined us on Tuesday, but wasn't there Wednesday. Wednesday, James went to rent his tux (and called me and asked for an opinion while I was on the highway back from Scottsdale) and my mother took me out shopping. Thursday was an eh day where nothing really happened. I must have gone home early that day. Friday, I went to James' house after school and his mother played with my hair for a little bit and did our makeup. I later hung out with Bella a little bit and we got manicures and pedicures. We wanted to go see Prom Night, but neh, it was late and I had to be up early the next morning. James was working at the theatre we passed as we were making decisions, we so could have visited him. Saturday morning, I woke up at around 5:30 and put my laptop on its charger. I kind of went back to sleep and 20 minutes later, one of the kids I built a website with called to make me email all of our files to him so he could back it up. I got up, dressed in my business formal outfit thing and sat around and waited for the clock. At 6:40, I left home and headed off to a National History Day competition up in Fountain Hills. Eh. Got there, things happened, we presented our website, we went out for lunch, and I left early and got home in time to pick up Bella and head over to James' house so his mother could do our hair and makeup for prom. We finished after the boys came over so they were couped in James' room while we were finishing up. We eventually left and headed to Bella's house and we dressed and got ready before people came and took pictures.
Dinner was amusing and fun and the boys managed to kick all of the girls out of the table so that they could chat chit for a little. The girls came back slightly amused and giggling, returning to our spots before. Eh. We got back in the car and drove to Mesa Marriot. Halfway towards it, to where you could see it, I remembered where it was (con was just there) and commented. I think I caught little attention and since no one was really there, nothing came of it, just some lewd in-the-makings comments. We got there early and was like second in line, so we stood around, played a little with poses and joked a bit before they finally let us in. Before we were inside, they stamped our wrists and one of the teachers doing it was surprised to see me in a dress and decided that he had to take pictures. James and I went to bug one of our teachers last year and talked to her about her Prom-baby quota for this year and we laughed as she told us the couple they were aiming for didn't even show up at prom. Wow. They played Every Time We Touch, so James and I wandered to the edge of the dance floor and were crazy like always. Bella found us a bit after and we all danced. Went back to talk to teacher before she forcefully shooed us away. They played their first slow song as the announced the king and queen, so half way through, James and I wander back into the main room and he asks me if I want to dance. Shrugging, we dance. It was entertaining. I can't say it was as victorious as my dance with DJ my sophomore year, but I definitely was jealous then and not now. More wandering, more destroying things, and eventually, we wandered outside and sat down for a little because the bass was seriously trying to kill us. Second slow song and then they kicked us out. They played Sandstorm (which I hate Bella for wanting. Seriously, you don't appreciate electronica if you listen to or enjoy Sandstorm. We tried so many times to explain that to her, but she never got it) towards the end and we all danced again. All in all, it was fun. We got out, dropped off DJ and his girlfriend and went to Denny's. ^_^ It was fun, got back at like 1:30 and crashed at Bella's. Woke up late the next morning and started baking. I swear, Bella doesn't know how to follow recipes and half the time, I swear she was screwing up the batch of stuff. I was permanently washing out the used stuff to reuse and she had control over my mixer where she instantly pushed the speed to full and made a mess...sad sad. James had come over to help us bake, so it was all fun.
Monday, after school, I went to pick up Andrei after school. Nothing really much happened after that. NHS induction where I started getting pissed at Bella because we had a long list of errands to run before 6:30. I got there at around 6 and we didn't leave until 6:20. Umm...Excuse me? She was playing a video game well after I got there and here, I was expecting to come in and out. Gosh! So I stayed away from her most of the night and chatted with those who would approach me. I had to drag her home afterwards because my dad had almost put me on lockdown. I don't like Bella for some reasons: she's always wasting my time and seriously needs to learn the meaning of sacrifice. I used to wait outside in the cold for her every morning she would pick me up and carpool to school. I sacrificed my comfort for being on time and convenient. She can't even sacrifice a game for me. She complains of everything that doesn't go her way and seriously needs to stop caring so much about EVERYTHING. We can't all run the world, babe. Monday night, I talked to James about how much I was starting to lose my respect in Bella, and so he's now one of the only people who really know how much I hate my best friend.
Tuesday, I went out to lunch with James and it was one amusing anecdote after another. He bought a giant thing of iced tea and in the last period of the day, drank all of it. Classes that day were okay, not too amusing and conversational at best. James is really distracting when I don't want to do work...After that, we dropped people off, taught me a little how to drive manual, and then hung out with Bella and went to dinner and dessert. It was entertaining and all, and James and I had a stale mate in chess. I swear, neither of us were really paying attention throughout the game.
Wednesday, we had a robotics meeting and after that, we met up with people and we chatted and learned about each others' pasts. Eh. Nothing much really. We all went home relatively early that day. Bella finally got online and we had a short chat before she needed to shower. James and I kept going at it and such. Great fun.
Thursday, classes were okay. After school, I tutored Otter and then left to meet Bella and James for a treat and then went back to Bella's again. We watched an episode of The Big Bang Theory and I loved it. James and I had a huge game of tag and we left somewhere around 5:30. I went and bought gas, $13 worth of random stuff I kind of needed, and condoms (which I definitely don't need, but really wanted for some reason or another). The greatest thing was, it was all on my mother's credit card. Hee hee.
What's really silly is the amount of physical contact that James and I have established as a standard. It used to be occasional, but now, it's like we're always curled together. Bella's already confronted him on the subject of asking me out (seriously, everyone is matchmaking us) and the way she reported it to me was the only thing stopping him was his commitment and trust issues. Well, not trust issues, because apparently, he trusts me. That's fine. I can wait, this is fun in itself. All of it just feels like a relationship, the only part that's really missing is the part where we cutely throw around "I Love You"s. I've been getting a lot better with not playing with people and in fact, I've stopped caring about the other boys. They aren't as perfect as I want them to be and you know what? I've dropped most every game I've had.
I really like talking to James...both of them. My friend that I've started the whole cake analogy with is a wonderful person to talk to because he's always there to provide humor and I feel I can tell him anything. We think it's because he's three years younger than I am and thusly harder to pass judgment. The James that I've been obsessed about for the past ever is just so...easy to talk to. He's like an outlet that I can talk to any time and he'd listen...he's good at listening. In a sense, he's kind of the personal part of my blog. The things I don't tell my best friend when it comes to my adventures are posted here and the things I don't tell her when it comes to emotions and how much I want to beat her sometimes gets passed along to him. It just feels so good to have someone to confide in that can actually give me advice. I'd always been too proud to go to the people that I knew would listen, but now, I've needed to cry for attention, and he gave me his. The most unexpected people still will come to help if I ask for it, and I'm just really glad that there are people around like them. I'd be so lost without everyone.
-Confrontation Will Have to Come
Scarlet Bloodmoon
Title From: Ecstacy by ATB
April 7th was another of my brothers' birthdays. We didn't do much and the only thing I really remember of that day was that I bought my ticket to the prom. Tuesday and Wednesday were half days where we got the afternoon to ourselves, so Bella, James and I had an adventure. Otter joined us on Tuesday, but wasn't there Wednesday. Wednesday, James went to rent his tux (and called me and asked for an opinion while I was on the highway back from Scottsdale) and my mother took me out shopping. Thursday was an eh day where nothing really happened. I must have gone home early that day. Friday, I went to James' house after school and his mother played with my hair for a little bit and did our makeup. I later hung out with Bella a little bit and we got manicures and pedicures. We wanted to go see Prom Night, but neh, it was late and I had to be up early the next morning. James was working at the theatre we passed as we were making decisions, we so could have visited him. Saturday morning, I woke up at around 5:30 and put my laptop on its charger. I kind of went back to sleep and 20 minutes later, one of the kids I built a website with called to make me email all of our files to him so he could back it up. I got up, dressed in my business formal outfit thing and sat around and waited for the clock. At 6:40, I left home and headed off to a National History Day competition up in Fountain Hills. Eh. Got there, things happened, we presented our website, we went out for lunch, and I left early and got home in time to pick up Bella and head over to James' house so his mother could do our hair and makeup for prom. We finished after the boys came over so they were couped in James' room while we were finishing up. We eventually left and headed to Bella's house and we dressed and got ready before people came and took pictures.
Dinner was amusing and fun and the boys managed to kick all of the girls out of the table so that they could chat chit for a little. The girls came back slightly amused and giggling, returning to our spots before. Eh. We got back in the car and drove to Mesa Marriot. Halfway towards it, to where you could see it, I remembered where it was (con was just there) and commented. I think I caught little attention and since no one was really there, nothing came of it, just some lewd in-the-makings comments. We got there early and was like second in line, so we stood around, played a little with poses and joked a bit before they finally let us in. Before we were inside, they stamped our wrists and one of the teachers doing it was surprised to see me in a dress and decided that he had to take pictures. James and I went to bug one of our teachers last year and talked to her about her Prom-baby quota for this year and we laughed as she told us the couple they were aiming for didn't even show up at prom. Wow. They played Every Time We Touch, so James and I wandered to the edge of the dance floor and were crazy like always. Bella found us a bit after and we all danced. Went back to talk to teacher before she forcefully shooed us away. They played their first slow song as the announced the king and queen, so half way through, James and I wander back into the main room and he asks me if I want to dance. Shrugging, we dance. It was entertaining. I can't say it was as victorious as my dance with DJ my sophomore year, but I definitely was jealous then and not now. More wandering, more destroying things, and eventually, we wandered outside and sat down for a little because the bass was seriously trying to kill us. Second slow song and then they kicked us out. They played Sandstorm (which I hate Bella for wanting. Seriously, you don't appreciate electronica if you listen to or enjoy Sandstorm. We tried so many times to explain that to her, but she never got it) towards the end and we all danced again. All in all, it was fun. We got out, dropped off DJ and his girlfriend and went to Denny's. ^_^ It was fun, got back at like 1:30 and crashed at Bella's. Woke up late the next morning and started baking. I swear, Bella doesn't know how to follow recipes and half the time, I swear she was screwing up the batch of stuff. I was permanently washing out the used stuff to reuse and she had control over my mixer where she instantly pushed the speed to full and made a mess...sad sad. James had come over to help us bake, so it was all fun.
Monday, after school, I went to pick up Andrei after school. Nothing really much happened after that. NHS induction where I started getting pissed at Bella because we had a long list of errands to run before 6:30. I got there at around 6 and we didn't leave until 6:20. Umm...Excuse me? She was playing a video game well after I got there and here, I was expecting to come in and out. Gosh! So I stayed away from her most of the night and chatted with those who would approach me. I had to drag her home afterwards because my dad had almost put me on lockdown. I don't like Bella for some reasons: she's always wasting my time and seriously needs to learn the meaning of sacrifice. I used to wait outside in the cold for her every morning she would pick me up and carpool to school. I sacrificed my comfort for being on time and convenient. She can't even sacrifice a game for me. She complains of everything that doesn't go her way and seriously needs to stop caring so much about EVERYTHING. We can't all run the world, babe. Monday night, I talked to James about how much I was starting to lose my respect in Bella, and so he's now one of the only people who really know how much I hate my best friend.
Tuesday, I went out to lunch with James and it was one amusing anecdote after another. He bought a giant thing of iced tea and in the last period of the day, drank all of it. Classes that day were okay, not too amusing and conversational at best. James is really distracting when I don't want to do work...After that, we dropped people off, taught me a little how to drive manual, and then hung out with Bella and went to dinner and dessert. It was entertaining and all, and James and I had a stale mate in chess. I swear, neither of us were really paying attention throughout the game.
Wednesday, we had a robotics meeting and after that, we met up with people and we chatted and learned about each others' pasts. Eh. Nothing much really. We all went home relatively early that day. Bella finally got online and we had a short chat before she needed to shower. James and I kept going at it and such. Great fun.
Thursday, classes were okay. After school, I tutored Otter and then left to meet Bella and James for a treat and then went back to Bella's again. We watched an episode of The Big Bang Theory and I loved it. James and I had a huge game of tag and we left somewhere around 5:30. I went and bought gas, $13 worth of random stuff I kind of needed, and condoms (which I definitely don't need, but really wanted for some reason or another). The greatest thing was, it was all on my mother's credit card. Hee hee.
What's really silly is the amount of physical contact that James and I have established as a standard. It used to be occasional, but now, it's like we're always curled together. Bella's already confronted him on the subject of asking me out (seriously, everyone is matchmaking us) and the way she reported it to me was the only thing stopping him was his commitment and trust issues. Well, not trust issues, because apparently, he trusts me. That's fine. I can wait, this is fun in itself. All of it just feels like a relationship, the only part that's really missing is the part where we cutely throw around "I Love You"s. I've been getting a lot better with not playing with people and in fact, I've stopped caring about the other boys. They aren't as perfect as I want them to be and you know what? I've dropped most every game I've had.
I really like talking to James...both of them. My friend that I've started the whole cake analogy with is a wonderful person to talk to because he's always there to provide humor and I feel I can tell him anything. We think it's because he's three years younger than I am and thusly harder to pass judgment. The James that I've been obsessed about for the past ever is just so...easy to talk to. He's like an outlet that I can talk to any time and he'd listen...he's good at listening. In a sense, he's kind of the personal part of my blog. The things I don't tell my best friend when it comes to my adventures are posted here and the things I don't tell her when it comes to emotions and how much I want to beat her sometimes gets passed along to him. It just feels so good to have someone to confide in that can actually give me advice. I'd always been too proud to go to the people that I knew would listen, but now, I've needed to cry for attention, and he gave me his. The most unexpected people still will come to help if I ask for it, and I'm just really glad that there are people around like them. I'd be so lost without everyone.
-Confrontation Will Have to Come
Scarlet Bloodmoon
Title From: Ecstacy by ATB
Thursday, April 10, 2008
Eh...Landscaping
You know what is silly? There are moments where I swear James pushes to a limit where I’m not expected to back down. In my hopeful moments, I wonder what he really wants and proceed to speculate freely (and oftentimes, it’s quite embarrassing to catch myself like that). In other moments, I shrug it off and wonder why he’s pushing his face so close to mine. Forgetting the moment, though, I stare into his eyes and wonder how I would act in a relationship with him. I’m not going to lie, after high school started, I’ve started getting more needy and physical. I mean…being the shallow and horrible person I am, I wouldn’t have any bit of a physical relationship with James. That’s why there are chocolate cakes and pieces of candy that I can freely take in. Well…somewhere, I think one of the reasons I’m so into the idea of a relationship is because deep down, there is a strong desire to prove that I am fully capable of an emotional relationship and somehow prove that I am the perfect girlfriend and can settle for the minimum…not that James is anything less than a wonderful guy.
There are moments of weakness where my little demoness wants an extra inch or two and snarls like an angry wolf when I rein her in tighter. I feel the random urge to give into this physical side where I set my demoness free and let her terrorize the male population. There are moments where people get close enough that I want to act out, but I’ve never let her go that far. I react to other people taking the initiative, but this time, I’m not starting anything. If he wants to kiss me, he’d have to do most of the work! I don’t know, there’s just something about the way I need to make myself appear to James, though, that keeps me on my best behavior around him. I mean, yes, I still make comments and think of these horribly raunchy thoughts, but I am better in his company than I am anywhere else. I don’t play as much and I am a lot more reserved. I knew he’d be good for me…
I’ve spent enough time with him in the past four months to really mean something, and recently, EVERYONE thinks we should start dating. I guess sometime between one of my last rants and like…yesterday, we’ve been lumped together as a couple for prom only because it was convenient and we were both going as singles anyways…Eh. It works. Bella thinks that it’s definitely obvious that I’m obsessed with him, so obvious that her oblivious Otter knows it. Well, then, wouldn’t that mean that eventually, I will get a direct approach thing so that I could stop obsessing?
Ooh! Side note, I got an application at Harkins, so I will fill it out eventually and turn it in. Eh. Not top priority, but sure.
I beam with pride every time he pats me on the head or says I did a good job. There is a level of knowing I am awesome every time he laughs at something silly that I’ve done. I’ve always been one to take small victories, so these small things really make me happy, you know? I’m finally getting my moments and when Bella is far away, there are comments thrown around that basically places me above her. I’ve never competed with Bella – ever. Not when I picked up an ex boyfriend of hers, not when we were both in relationships and life was all dandy and lollipops, not when we’ve competed together in competitions: she’s never been a real threat.
On this note, Bella’s been having a bit of turmoil in her relationship. I’m not going to lie; I’ve never submitted myself to this torture where I cared enough of how my time with a boyfriend was spent. I was glad to have time with him (especially after my parents went into lockdown mode) and it really didn’t matter what we were doing. Towards the end, I could have run on pure conversation. I didn’t need to see him. I was happy to see the amount of love in his eyes. I was flattered to know the privy things about him. I was amused when he presented me with cake. I guess most of it came from the fact that he was too mature for his age and whatever he did made me feel like he thought about me. He gave me a level of dominance that made me feel powerful and sexy, and so much flattered my ego and boosted my confidence that I just couldn’t stop and keel over until a new relationship after that one broke off.
I kept looking for that one hit of power and dominance. I kept looking for that one person who I could play with that would make me feel as fulfilled as he had. I never really found a person to do that, but I did find a number of people who would come to me for “favors.” I don’t want someone to keel over and wait to be abused, I wanted someone who would play along but let me get top for the sake of letting me feel powerful. I wanted someone who would let me think I had control and then easily take it away and dominate me. I want to be flattered and proven powerful and sexy, but I want to be submissive at the same time. I want to feel their power, that overwhelming force that I could take solace in, that I could be wrapped in and feel nothing else but their power over me. It’s kind of weird. I want to be worshiped and served a little, but on the other hand, I want them to strip me of all power and prove to me that they are worth running to when the day goes bad.
I swear I would so be into bondage and being tied up. I would love to be pinned down and held powerless as he slowly tortures me…Wow, that was a tangent…
I’ve stopped looking for the next game. I am happily and actively involved in a small-scale game where I try to be the cutest I can and casually interact with James, using slight amounts of physical contact. I mean, there are hugs (because I give most everyone hugs) and select moments, I choose to rest my head on his shoulder or pull closer to him or rest my hand in the crook of his arm (which is adorable because he’s way tall and it doesn’t really work that well). We’ve just gotten to a point where we’re being cute and annoying the heck out of everyone around us for not making sense at all. We randomly greet each other with “Good morning, how are you?” at any time of the day (especially past
Eh, nothing much else to talk about I guess…
Scarlet Bloodmoon
Sunday, April 6, 2008
Clip The Wings That Get You High, Just Leave Them Where They Lie
My weekend really started on Thursday. My car was booted at school that day and after a bout of lying to the lady I needed to lie to, she finally got the security guards to remove the device on my tire. My friends gathered around my car for a little bit while the security people were removing the thing and while the two guards tried to figure out how to use the key (ridiculous, no?), James, Captain, Otter, and another kid walked to the other side of the parking lot. Something exploded when the foursome were halfway across the parking lot, far away from the actual explosion. After walking to where they needed to go and walked back to investigate the explosion. Come on, they're teenage males. Did you think they wouldn't? So, after noticing that there really wasn't much to it, they came back to where I was and just as I was about to pull out of the parking space, a lady called them back and directed them to the office. Long story short, they were accused of setting off an explosive and the administration (as crappy as it is) tried to get me to incriminate the four of them and even tried to get them to confess to it. For two and a half hours, it was just nonstop, hardcore trying to get them into trouble. They eventually got off with no punishments, but there was a police report filed. They had their Miranda rights read to them...Sounds like fun.
Bella joined us somewhere along the lines and the six of us eventually met up at the end of it all and discussed it through. Getting the whole story straight, another kid joined us. By this time, the straggler kid and Captain had left, leaving Bella, Otter, MoMo, James, and I. We all piled into the bed of James' truck and just sat and chatted about stuff. Otter left relatively soon after that. We talked about the blatant homosexuality of the football team and other stuff (where we all realized that I had the cleanest childhood and was really the luckiest one out of the four that remained). We eventually got out of the parking lot and Bella, James and I headed over to James' house so that he could drop off his car and we could head off to Tempe for a presentation at the Gammage theatre.
We got dinner from a place called Cornish Pasty which was really good. First sitting down, we arranged ourselves so that Bella and I were sitting on a side of where there was a bench and James was across the table on a chair. I was on the outside and after a few comments, James was coerced into moving to our side. Score! Physical contact right? Well, it wasn't that much, and really, all I did was start a game of tag...The dessert was pavlova, which is a meringue with whipped cream and fruits. It was yummy, and since I'm such a whipped cream whore, it was fun. (The story behind that: after random events where James was present, he came to the conclusion that I rather enjoyed whipped cream. In fact, it got to the point where we joke about me having - for example - waffles with my whipped cream instead of my whipped cream with waffles.) So, we decided that by the time we were done, we weren't going to make the presentation, so we just walked around Mill for a little bit.
We drove down to Mill, where Bella was sure I was going to kill us all with my driving, and started at an interesting clothing/ness store called Urban Outfitters. It was fun and we stopped and flipped through a book where action figures were arranged in interesting ways. We then headed to Hippie Gypsy, where we swore would have every parent pull out drug tests after being in there and they had the cutest stickers and signs. After that, we trekked to Borders and then back to a random Sub Deli place. It was just about 10 then so we started on our way home. Heading back, we stopped at Basha's and got stuff. Dropping people off, I returned home.
Friday, after going through school, I stayed a little bit after school and got home at 3:30. My baby brother (of 7) got home shortly after I did and imagine my surprise when he came in and cursed my brother (16 on Monday) for forgetting to pick him up! I got a few things done and in an hour, headed off to Bella's house. I called James (we were planning on catching a play called Triangle) and somehow worked it out so that we'd all meet back at my house. Well, when I got to Bella's, she was asleep-ish on her bed and kind of distraught.
After coercing her out of bed and into clothes, a string of events happened and she was distraught over Otter and the fact that it seemed like an unbalanced relationship. James showed up at the door and I was downstairs to let him in. We paced around downstairs for a little bit and listened to Bella's sister and her friends play Guitar Hero 3 before heading upstairs and setting up a game of pool. I won twice only because the 8 ball hated James and eventually, we just gave up and retreated for the sole chair in the loft (that's where we were). He took up most of the chair, but I was perched on the armrest. Wrapping an arm around him for support, I was delighted when his hand grasped mine (This is where I get silly and girly...). Eventually, Bella's sister came over and told us that Bella was crying and that we should probably go see if we could do something. We decided that I was better suited and so I went.
Bella and I talked a little bit about it, but we mostly skirted around the main point. We decided that the night was more of an "indoors" night anyways and called James into the room to redo the plans. James eventually called Otter and chewed him out about being a horrible person and we decided that the day was Bella's - whatever she wanted. So, we went out for a little bit of shopping for stuff (and even though we didn't buy anything to throw and break), we got back with soda and sparkling apple cider. Dinner and then I put a bottle of sparkling apple cider in the freezer, turning to James and instructing him to remind me to take it out later.
An hour later, I realized that the bottle was still in the freezer and nearly leaped out of my own skin to make sure it didn't explode in the freezer. It didn't. In fact, it barely froze. There were little bits of ice, but other than that, it was fine. So, pouring cups of it (into plastic cups no less, that was amusing), we sat down for another movie. Before we started, Bella called Otter and then disappeared to another room. Okay. It got a bit quiet before Bella's sister and friends came down and the dogs started barking and stuffs. Okay. We went upstairs to play another game of pool (which lasted significantly longer) and James won this time. My mother called and told me to get home, so I finished the game of pool and chatted a little with everyone before heading off.
Saturday was relatively tame in comparison I guess. I woke up to a call from Bella and rushed off to school for a practice AP test. It went alright, I finished it all in time and the essays were alright. I guess I'm expecting mediocre results. I got home, my dad a little mad that I disappeared, but he disappeared for a little, so whatever. My middle brother went off to a band thing at 2, so I drove him to school. It was his birthday, how could I not? I got back, tended to my 16-year-old brother and eventually got back from shopping for him. Eh. We got home, did some stuff, and then my dad came back home. I sat down with some sewing, and a little bit of computer ness, and eventually, told my mother to go find Birthday brother and pick him up. Two of his friends had shown up for his party thing by the time he got back, and the third showed up shortly after he did. We ran and got pizza and a cake and the boys played games until 9 when I sat them down for cake and more sparkling apple cider. All was good.
Sunday, I woke up relatively early (8-ish I guess) and woke my brothers up at 9. I sewed for an hour before I gave up on my pants. I got the boys breakfast and then hopped on my computer a little more. Eventually, we played Starcraft, which was fun. Nothing much. I withdrew 60 dollars from my account and now need a job. Tomorrow, I shall get prom ticket. Went out to dinner, and I swear, my dad just gets even more annoying the more time I spend with him. Got back, more computer, and apparently, I'm getting a printer, a chess board and set, and three keyboard keys from James on Monday...I'm looking forward to this.
This should be fun. Nothing to do but wait for the future to unfold. I can plan, but when the time comes, if I don't execute the plan, then where the hell would that leave me? I should so corner DJ's girlfriend and tell her to arrange it so that James goes to prom with me...So silly...
-Anxiety Doesn't Bode Well
Scarlet Bloodmoon
Title From: Remedy by Seether
Bella joined us somewhere along the lines and the six of us eventually met up at the end of it all and discussed it through. Getting the whole story straight, another kid joined us. By this time, the straggler kid and Captain had left, leaving Bella, Otter, MoMo, James, and I. We all piled into the bed of James' truck and just sat and chatted about stuff. Otter left relatively soon after that. We talked about the blatant homosexuality of the football team and other stuff (where we all realized that I had the cleanest childhood and was really the luckiest one out of the four that remained). We eventually got out of the parking lot and Bella, James and I headed over to James' house so that he could drop off his car and we could head off to Tempe for a presentation at the Gammage theatre.
We got dinner from a place called Cornish Pasty which was really good. First sitting down, we arranged ourselves so that Bella and I were sitting on a side of where there was a bench and James was across the table on a chair. I was on the outside and after a few comments, James was coerced into moving to our side. Score! Physical contact right? Well, it wasn't that much, and really, all I did was start a game of tag...The dessert was pavlova, which is a meringue with whipped cream and fruits. It was yummy, and since I'm such a whipped cream whore, it was fun. (The story behind that: after random events where James was present, he came to the conclusion that I rather enjoyed whipped cream. In fact, it got to the point where we joke about me having - for example - waffles with my whipped cream instead of my whipped cream with waffles.) So, we decided that by the time we were done, we weren't going to make the presentation, so we just walked around Mill for a little bit.
We drove down to Mill, where Bella was sure I was going to kill us all with my driving, and started at an interesting clothing/ness store called Urban Outfitters. It was fun and we stopped and flipped through a book where action figures were arranged in interesting ways. We then headed to Hippie Gypsy, where we swore would have every parent pull out drug tests after being in there and they had the cutest stickers and signs. After that, we trekked to Borders and then back to a random Sub Deli place. It was just about 10 then so we started on our way home. Heading back, we stopped at Basha's and got stuff. Dropping people off, I returned home.
Friday, after going through school, I stayed a little bit after school and got home at 3:30. My baby brother (of 7) got home shortly after I did and imagine my surprise when he came in and cursed my brother (16 on Monday) for forgetting to pick him up! I got a few things done and in an hour, headed off to Bella's house. I called James (we were planning on catching a play called Triangle) and somehow worked it out so that we'd all meet back at my house. Well, when I got to Bella's, she was asleep-ish on her bed and kind of distraught.
After coercing her out of bed and into clothes, a string of events happened and she was distraught over Otter and the fact that it seemed like an unbalanced relationship. James showed up at the door and I was downstairs to let him in. We paced around downstairs for a little bit and listened to Bella's sister and her friends play Guitar Hero 3 before heading upstairs and setting up a game of pool. I won twice only because the 8 ball hated James and eventually, we just gave up and retreated for the sole chair in the loft (that's where we were). He took up most of the chair, but I was perched on the armrest. Wrapping an arm around him for support, I was delighted when his hand grasped mine (This is where I get silly and girly...). Eventually, Bella's sister came over and told us that Bella was crying and that we should probably go see if we could do something. We decided that I was better suited and so I went.
Bella and I talked a little bit about it, but we mostly skirted around the main point. We decided that the night was more of an "indoors" night anyways and called James into the room to redo the plans. James eventually called Otter and chewed him out about being a horrible person and we decided that the day was Bella's - whatever she wanted. So, we went out for a little bit of shopping for stuff (and even though we didn't buy anything to throw and break), we got back with soda and sparkling apple cider. Dinner and then I put a bottle of sparkling apple cider in the freezer, turning to James and instructing him to remind me to take it out later.
An hour later, I realized that the bottle was still in the freezer and nearly leaped out of my own skin to make sure it didn't explode in the freezer. It didn't. In fact, it barely froze. There were little bits of ice, but other than that, it was fine. So, pouring cups of it (into plastic cups no less, that was amusing), we sat down for another movie. Before we started, Bella called Otter and then disappeared to another room. Okay. It got a bit quiet before Bella's sister and friends came down and the dogs started barking and stuffs. Okay. We went upstairs to play another game of pool (which lasted significantly longer) and James won this time. My mother called and told me to get home, so I finished the game of pool and chatted a little with everyone before heading off.
Saturday was relatively tame in comparison I guess. I woke up to a call from Bella and rushed off to school for a practice AP test. It went alright, I finished it all in time and the essays were alright. I guess I'm expecting mediocre results. I got home, my dad a little mad that I disappeared, but he disappeared for a little, so whatever. My middle brother went off to a band thing at 2, so I drove him to school. It was his birthday, how could I not? I got back, tended to my 16-year-old brother and eventually got back from shopping for him. Eh. We got home, did some stuff, and then my dad came back home. I sat down with some sewing, and a little bit of computer ness, and eventually, told my mother to go find Birthday brother and pick him up. Two of his friends had shown up for his party thing by the time he got back, and the third showed up shortly after he did. We ran and got pizza and a cake and the boys played games until 9 when I sat them down for cake and more sparkling apple cider. All was good.
Sunday, I woke up relatively early (8-ish I guess) and woke my brothers up at 9. I sewed for an hour before I gave up on my pants. I got the boys breakfast and then hopped on my computer a little more. Eventually, we played Starcraft, which was fun. Nothing much. I withdrew 60 dollars from my account and now need a job. Tomorrow, I shall get prom ticket. Went out to dinner, and I swear, my dad just gets even more annoying the more time I spend with him. Got back, more computer, and apparently, I'm getting a printer, a chess board and set, and three keyboard keys from James on Monday...I'm looking forward to this.
This should be fun. Nothing to do but wait for the future to unfold. I can plan, but when the time comes, if I don't execute the plan, then where the hell would that leave me? I should so corner DJ's girlfriend and tell her to arrange it so that James goes to prom with me...So silly...
-Anxiety Doesn't Bode Well
Scarlet Bloodmoon
Title From: Remedy by Seether
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